The Mudville Gazette
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Thursday, May 01, 2003


As you read the following excerpt from another site, see if you can guess from where I plagiarized it. Play along with me, no peeking ahead. Who thinks the supreme court is responsible for America's most cherished values including privacy, choice, and environmental policy? Who wants to portray G.W. Bush as part of a vast and evil right-wing conspiracy to undo decades of progress and destroy our cherished American values? Could it be the Fidel Castro homepage? A juvenile left-wing blog? The American Communist Party Special May Day Announcement? ANSWER? Read on and guess...

Act Now! America's Values at Risk With Supreme Court Vacancy
The United States Supreme Court protects America's most cherished values: equal rights and protections for all, public education, environmental safeguards, the right to privacy, a woman's right to choose, civil liberties, free speech, religious freedom, and much more.

But these American values are endangered.
One or more Supreme Court Justices will likely retire at the end of the current session this June. When this happens, President George W. Bush will name ultra-conservative nominees who will vote to quickly overturn decades of Supreme Court protections of our cherished American values.

You and your friends must get involved NOW. The clock is ticking -- and the right wing is aggressively readying for this fight.
We've already seen the signs:

Secret meetings, including one at the Bush White House with Chief Justice Rehnquist...
Secret fundraisers, including one hosted by former President George Bush, to raise money for a massive, expensive ad campaign pushing Bush's judicial nominees...
Republican Senator Orrin Hatch -- the chair of the Senate committee that considers judicial nominations -- has pressured Supreme Court Justices to make their move...
When one or more Justices retire at the end of this June, Bush will -- just a few days later -- name ultra-conservative nominees who will quickly vote to overturn decades of Supreme Court protections of our cherished American values.

Wow! The extremist Bush will nominate replacement judges just a few days after the old ones retire! How evil is that? Who would call to rally the people against any Bush nominee before they are nominated? Who could think Americans are this stupid? The Democratic National Committee, that's who. They are rallying the troops on their homepage even now. One of their tactics is to recruit ecaptains, who will receive and forward email to eprecincts from the DNC overlords. And guess who just signed up? Yep, you all are now my eprecinct. And I'll be faithfully updating you on all the latest hot propa.. I mean news from the DNC, right here on the Mudville Gazette. I do it cause I love you people!

And here's our first vital, important message straight from the DNC through me, your eCaptain Greyhawk (note: To avoid confusion I will use pink to designate my DNC messages to you! Otherwise, the message will be unedited by me in any way, shape or form. I'm confident my DNC boys will be funny on their own.):

DNC Chairman McAuliffe's Statement on Bush's Praise of Senator Santorum
Washington, D.C. -- Democratic National Committee (DNC) Chairman Terry McAuliffe issued the following statement:

"President Bush is awfully selective in which American values he chooses to comment on. Rick Santorum this week disparaged and demeaned a whole segment of Americans and for that President Bush praises him. Three young women in the music business expressed their views and it warrants presidential action. I would suggest that rather than scold the Dixie Chicks, President Bush would best serve America by taking Rick Santorum to the woodshed."

"The White House said GOP Sen. Rick Santorum is doing a good job as party leader and is 'an inclusive man,' despite his controversial remarks on homosexuality." [Associated Press, 04/25/03]

"In an interview with NBC television's news anchor Tom Brokaw on Thursday, Bush said the Dixie Chicks were 'free to speak their mind.' They can say what they want to say ... freedom is a two-way street. But I don't really care what the Dixie Chicks said, I want to do what I think is right for the American people and if some singers or Hollywood stars feel like speaking out that's fine," Bush said. [Reuters, 04/24/03]

Wow, that's some spanking the Pres gave those Dixies. Almost as bad as the thrashing he gave Saddam. And I can understand why a guy like McAulliffe wants Bush to take Santorum to a woodshed, but Dubya don't play that way, okay Terry?

There's plenty more where that came from. And nobody's gonna report on this like yours truly will. Tell all your good Democrat friends to join Captain Greyhawk's ePrecinct today!