The Mudville Gazette
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Monday, April 14, 2003


Little Timmy Robbins, every bit as clueless
in person as in the movie "Bull Durham" appeared on the Today Show this morning to explain the "vast right-wing anti-free speech big-corporation George Bush conspiracy" to keep him and his current life-partner Suzy Sarandon from appearing at the Baseball Hall of Fame or United Way fundraisers.

"It's not about me and Sue" He babbled, "It's about all the little people who in the climate of the country today are being ridiculed and suppressed by all this rampant free speech and thought and diversity of opinion and everybody is brainwashed except me. Unspecified children are being kicked out of school somewhere for wearing peace signs and something got cancelled somewhere because of a prayer for Iraqi citizens and everybody knows I support public prayer. It's true I heard it from a friend of a friend at a family reunion. We have to stop these people using their free speech to make other people afraid to speak freely. And some guy in the south called a radio station and said he's so angry he wants to kill a specific movie star whose name I'm not saying! And movie stars are this nations most precious resource! It's not the fault of the little people, they are just brainwashed by Bush and corporate America like for instance Clear Channel Communication!"

Today Host Matt Lauer, just back from the Middle East, may have drawn blood from his cheeks by biting down to keep from laughing. In a rare move, the show broke away briefly for more important issues then had Robbins reappear a bit later in an apparent attempt to determine if the man could make any coherent points at all. No such evidence was offered.

Yea...this whole free speech thing is getting way out of control...