|The Mudville Gazette|
Sunday, April 20, 2003
From 11 Apr 03:
COMMUNISTS REVEAL HOT NEW BUZZ WORD FOR SPRING(Washington IP News)
The international communist party today announced the "hot new buzz word" for spring.
"It's Neocon." Said a spokesprole. "This spring, when you want to announce loud and clear that your political preference is somewhere left of Stalin; when you want the word that says "Saddam got a raw deal!" you want "Neocon".
The pressroom was all abuzz as the assembled reporters began eagerly repeating the word to ensure proper pronunciation.
"Additional information is in your press kits." Continued the speaker. "And please read the guidelines for proper application and combination! Although this word is currently approved for use in place of 'Republican' it is not yet synonymous with 'fascist!' or 'religious right'. But we can achieve great things when we work together!
Now, as to the protests this weekend..."
"This is very helpful." Stated a well-known morning news anchor, "It will really go a long way towards appearing to be unbiased."
Various reporters were heard to be practicing "Neocon Republican...no, no, wait..." and "...Neocon commentator..", "...Neocon warmonger...", and "Neocon agenda..." as the conference broke up.
"Remember" the speaker shouted at the departing reporters "At least once every newscast!"