The Mudville Gazette
This is Mudville Gazette Back-up Site

Wednesday, April 23, 2003


Washington (IP NEWS) Tom Daschle, (D-S.D.) deranged Senate Minority Leader and one of a very few Democrats still not running for President, has vowed to oppose President Bush's yet to be made final decision regarding Federal Reserve Chairman Alan Greenspan.

"We are not waiting, we will not be reactionary this time." Mr Daschle stated. "We will be proactive on this occasion. Let the word go out now even before the decision is made, whatever that decision may be, we are against it."

Mr Greenspan, 77 years old and recovering from prostate surgery, has held his position for almost 16 years. Some speculation as to his future has been heard in the vicinity of the White House and Capitol Hill. The President has stated his intention to offer Mr Greenspan a fifth term as chairman. Mr Greenspan has indicated he would accept.

"If that's the case, and we certainly feel it's premature to assume so at this time, then we would condemn the action as bribery of the worst sort." Stated Mr. Daschle. "Buying Mr Greenspan's favors with job offers would be looked upon with suspicion at best." When asked then what if the President declined to offer Mr Greenspan an additional four-year term, Mr Daschle added "We would find that behavior reprehensible. Age discrimination is bigotry of the worst order, and firing an individual who may be eligible for the Americans with Disabilities Act is beyond comprehension and completely unforgivable."

Mr Daschle's statements were applauded by House Minority Leader Nancy Pigliosi (D-CA.)and immediately echoed by most of the 46 current Democratic candidates for President. "When Mr Daschle says 'we', he doesn't mean himself and a mouse in his pocket." Said John Kerry, (C-MA.) a presidential hopeful and liar of Clintonian proportions.